July 8, 2010

Sorry, kid, you got your mama’s genes

We had Moe’s three year doctor’s appointment this week. At our doctor, the first thing we do at the appointment is respond to an age-appropriate developmental questionnaire. This was Moe’s first regular pediatrician appointment since his diagnosis. Dr. G gets all of Moe’s records, of course, but because Jelly sees the same doctor, we’ve also had a few chances to chat with her about how things have been going. So there was no surprise that the answers to almost all of the questions was “no.” No, he doesn’t throw a ball overhand. No, at least 50% of words are not intelligible (words? what words?). No, he can’t pedal a tricycle. Doesn’t know his name, age or sex. Can’t carry dishes or help set the table. (This one cracks me up. Have they met my husband?)

It was actually a bit liberating. We know Moe isn’t where he is supposed to be, so I wasn’t upset about it. It used to be that any reminder of how far behind he is would get me pretty upset. I guess this is growth. And actually, he could do quite a few of the things on the list. He does help dress himself to some degree and can sometimes copy a circle. He can jump in place, kick a ball and alternate feet when ascending stairs. These questionnaires are there to point out any potential problems. We’re already there.

What I wasn’t prepared for was the other information we got. If you know me, you know I’m not tall. Okay, I’m short. Under five feet, in fact. My grandmother called me “diminutive.” I liked that. But Jeff is quite average in height so I’ve held out hope for Moe. He’s been around the fifth percentile for height since birth, but he was born a few weeks early. He had one brief moment at the 25th, but we now think that was a measurement error. So, okay, he’s on the small side. It’s not  a medical problem, and it shouldn’t be any big surprise. But our doctor said he’s on track to be five foot four or five as an adult and I’ll admit I was bummed. I know this is not anything I should be worried about and I can’t do anything about it. But I also know that Moe is going to have a lot of challenges, especially socially, as he gets older. Being short, especially as a boy, is only going to make it harder.

Moe looks just like Jeff. Has his curls. Has his blue eyes. But apparently, he’s got my height. Poor kid just can’t catch a break.


  1. I'm not a SHORT woman, but I'm not TALL either (5'6"-ish). Tim is tall, but not TOO tall at 6'2"-6'3"ish. Both kids seem to be in about the 60th/70th percentile for height right now. They are both built JUST like him (long torso, short legs), so maybe they will get his height too. And he was the runt in his family (his dad was taller, and his uncle was really tall!).

    My own dad is only 5'7 1/2" - so the fact that I'm as tall as I am seems amazing, especially since my sisters are both under 5'4".

    I'm glad the ped visit went well. our ped doesn't even ask us questions regarding the J-man's development anymore. Really.

  2. Good to hear from you Mary:) Clearly the predictions aren't always right, and even if this one is, being short isn't the end of the world. I think the developmental stuff can be so overwhelming that it's easier to focus on "normal" stuff like height.

  3. By standard prediction at the age of 2 1/2, my sister was supposed to attain a height of 6'5''. She is now 25 and stands at 5'9 just like me and our mother. These things are hardly precise. :-)

    BTW, I think of you often and visit your blog regularly. You are a fabulous writer and you really inspire me in many ways. -Sarah


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