June 4, 2010

A Prayer for Sleep

I've been lucky when it comes to my kids and sleep. Sure, we had the typical rough few months with both of my newborns, but at four months old, we took a hard line. We sleep trained. We let them cry it out. We stuck to early bed times and a good nap schedule. And it worked. My kids learned to self-soothe and fall asleep on their own. Sure, we had (and still have) the occasion rough night for teething or stuffy noses, but most nights they slept twelve hours a night. My kids were good sleepers.

I tried not to brag about it at mom's groups meetings and playdates. While others were talking about their sleep issues, I tried to keep quiet about how good I had it. I would offer suggestions as to what we did, trying to sympathize but also feeling like there must be something they were doing wrong - something we somehow did better. Well, ladies, it's payback time.

The sleep monster has struck our house, and good. It started about 6 months ago. Moe, my 3 year old with ASD, started waking up in the middle of the night. We'd hear him playing, often giggling. He'd stay up for an hour or maybe two, and would eventually fall back asleep. I was a little concerned because it made it harder for him to wake up in time for his 8 am therapy sessions, but by the time I consulted with our OT on some strategies to help him get back to sleep, he had grown out of it.

Then, about a month or so ago, Moe started to have some trouble falling asleep. The behavior was similar. He'd giggle and shriek in his crib. He was clearly over-stimulated and it started taking longer and longer for him to fall asleep, sometimes up to three or four hours. Again, this made for difficult mornings. We consulted with our OT, made sure we had a 30 minute wind down bedtime routine, tried the calming techniques. Nothing worked, and after consulting with our doctor, started him on melatonin before bed. It works like a charm at helping him fall asleep.

Relief! Problem sovled! Right? Right?? Wrong. Now we have a new problem. Moe is once again waking up in the middle of the night and having trouble falling asleep. On three separate occasions - enough to qualify as a trend in my book - he has been up for over five hours. Yes, dear readers, my once-was-a-great-sleeper child is waking up at midnight and not falling asleep until five in the morning. I feel like I have a newborn again. I'm so tired I can barely remember my name.

Everything is worse when we are tired. Moe's behaviors increase and speech decreases. My patience and ability to look at things with any measure of perspective goes out the window. I crave chocolate chip cookies. It gets harder for me to hide the bags under my eyes. It isn't pretty. Oh, cruel and vengeful gods of sleep, I beseech you. I am at your mercy. Please, let this pass.

A lot of other interesting stuff has been going on over here, but I'm way too tired to post about it now. This was originally published at Autism Sucks.

1 comment:

  1. tell me about it. My daughter was never a good sleeper. The two years of her being with us make me feel like I havent slept for 8 ours ever in my life. I have forgotten how it feels.
    She is like this all the time, sometimes she cant go to sleep, sometimes she sleeps but wakes up at 5 am and then sleeps again at 6.30-7 for an hour before her sessions at 8. And then there are days like today, when she woke up at 6.30 and was done for the day by 10 and wanted to sleep. In her second session for the morning, she just kept crying so we had to end it in half an hour instead of 2 hours. Its tough...I wish I could do something to help her sleep properly and stick to a routine of sleeping. I know you pain my friend!!!


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