September 6, 2009

Deep breath

I've been working on a post for several days now, the gist of which is this: as someone who has experienced great personal loss, I should be more thankful that Moe is healthy and happy. But even though I know that, I can't help but feel sad for what Moe's future may hold, and that just being alive and well isn't enough. I want him to have everything.

Then on Friday night, Moe woke up crying, struggling for breath. He was wheezing and as I held him I could feel his chest pulling in deep as he tried to take in air. Jeff took Moe to the emergency room, where they gave him a steroid and had him breathe in a fine mist. He is fine - just a case of croup.

But what a wake up call! I've been feeling so down lately, worried about all of the bumps in the road ahead. Of course, I still want Moe to have everything, and it is hard to know that things may not go as smoothly for him as for other kids. But he's going to be just fine. Now that he is breathing easier, I am too.

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